Sophisticated Love Lesson #5: Online Dating Etiquette

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In the 21st Century,  the technology has advanced to the point where a computer can predict who we are most compatible with, who we fall in love with, and who we should date to increase the odds of compatibility. Online dating is the only dating stage, lesson, and rule.How can online dating ever be a lesson in dating and relationships?

For single people there are several opportunities to discover love. One of those opportunities is in the  online dating world. There is Match.com, Chemistry.com, eHarmony.com, Zoosk, and GoFish.com to name a few. Online dating on any of these web sites has the same rules as any social media web site. They have the same golden rule "Be Positive" and the same level of Sophistication including being yourself. Although misrepresentation can be fun, it can also ensure that your first date will be your last. You are paving the way for mistrust and subsequently, a doomed relationship. 

From experience, here is a quick summary of differences among the dating sites:

Match.com: Looking for 'Friends with Benefits'
Chemistry.com: More for people who are looking for a relationship
eHarmony.com: A cross between 'Match.com' and 'Chemistry.com'
Zoosk: Same as Facebook
GoFish.com: See Match.com only worse

As far as safety, Match. com, Chemistry.com and eHarmony.com are the best. Regardless of the online dating site the same dating etiquette still applies:

- Your profile should have the right picture and information
- Reflect yourself in a positive manner and be positive in all communication
- If you are not interested, politely let the other person know
- Don't get too personal too fast since anything documented leaves a trail
- Keep your e-mail messages to a limited amount
- Utilize your e-mails for introductory purposes only
- Contact and meet the person as soon as possible
- Never ask the other person for anything*
- Don't exchange numbers until you have something planned
- Expect to pay for your meal

*Until there is an understanding of an established relationship either a friendship or more, be wary of providing any more than you have to whether it be pictures information or even a piece of gum

What is the most important lesson for online dating? Safety. 
What is the biggest lesson? Whether online dating is suited for you.  


Isn't online dating for everyone? Not necessarily. Every Sophisticate has to determine whether for the cost and time, online dating will fit her as a way for love to find her. For example, in my case i know that online dating brings out the more superficial and selective side of my personality. For me, I know those sides are not the most attractive qualities and therefore, are not the best for me to find love.  Also, I believe that even if another person has a profile that has met all of the attributes I would imagine would be perfect for me that doesn't guarantee a successful relationship. The element of chemistry and attraction between two people is important as well. Finally, I've never had a problem going out by myself. After work I'm more spontaneous and laid back. In the end, I've always believed that the best way for me to find someone is to live my life going places I enjoy alone thereby allowing me the opportunity for love to find me rather then the other way around.


In the end, a Sophisticate knows that in the 21st Century online dating etiquette is the same is face-to-face dating etiquette. To be continued... ;D!