Sophisticated Love Lesson #8: Break-Up or Break Down?

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"True love is not how you forgive but it's how you forget, not what you see but what you feel, and not how you let go but how you hold on" Anonymous


When a  relationship ends, the text messages, the phone calls, and getting together ends. It's quiet. Too quiet. When the relationship ends, you feel as if you were in a state of shock. The comfort of the arms that once held you, the laughter, the security of having someone there when you needed help, and the happiness felt in days past are gone.


Relationships are made up of small moments. Those small moments make up a routine. No one likes change and a routine is familiar and comfortable. When a relationship ends, the happiness found from a comfortable routine is gone. In life, you try to forget the bad and remember the good. When it comes to the end of a relationship, the opposite is true. Therefore, why does time heal a broken heart? Because over time you forget the good and remember the bad. 

Unfortunately, when a good relationship ends, you don't want to forget the good times. You want to hold on to the good memories and the good in the other person that made you a better person. 

So, why do they call it breaking up? Is there anything 'up' or positive about being separated from someone? Is there anything fun about being separated from someone who you enjoyed spending time with? Yes. The positive of a good relationship is that you become a better person as a result of knowing them.  (See Personal Love Lesson). The positive of a bad relationship is that you learn from the mistakes and the arguments (See Sophisticated Love Lesson #4: The Fight) to correct for the next relationship.

For a Sophisticate, the 'up' or positive part of breaking up or a separation is that a she discovers what he meant to her in her life. A break up or separation could make her realize that they were just friends. On the other hand, the break up or separation could make her realize that she doesn't want to live her life without him.

Sophisticated Love Lesson #8: Breaking-Up or Break-Down?: A Sophisticate has a break 'up' not a break 'down' when a relationship ends. She is strong enough to wake up in the morning to live the life she was destined to live. Time will determine her destiny. Is the person she is separated from gone for the moment or forever? It doesn't matter because in the end, the most positive aspect of a break up or separation is that he will hold a special place in her heart, not for the moment but forever. ;D