A Sophisticate is Envy

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“Sometimes we want what we want even if we know it’s going to kill us.” Donna TarttThe Goldfinch

In the Bible in the book of Genesis the serpent as represented by Satan tempted Eve to eat the apple and Adam followed. The result? Paradise lost. The punishment was that God forced the serpent to crawl on his belly thus, the snake was created. The fact that the snake represents envy brings up an important question in my mind, is envy the snake or the lure of our temptation that results in our own paradise lost? Or are we always to be punished for obtaining the "apple"  of our eye aka the object of what we desire most? 

A lot of people get so hung up on what they can't have that they don't think for a second about whether they really want it.” Lionel ShriverChecker and the Derailleurs

Jealousy is the most productive of the seven deadly sins. Jealousy is a sign that we desire something. It is the apple in our paradise that is tempting us to a better life. The question is, does it bring us to a better life? 

A lot of people get so hung up on what they can't have that they don't think for a second about whether they really want it.” Lionel ShriverChecker and the Derailleurs

I was the queen of wanting what I couldn't have. I loved the idea of a challenge. The problem was, once I got it, I was ungrateful and never satisfied. When I got something I always wanted more (A Sophisticate is Avarice).  That is, until I started working with a life coach.

“You can only be jealous of someone who has something you think you ought to have yourself.” Margaret Atwood "The Handmaids Tale"

Working with Andy Kostow CEO of Dream Life Thinking two things happened first, I realized that if I wanted something there was no challenge because I could obtain it (What is "The Secret?"). Second, with my established goals, if my desire or the pursuit of my desire didn't make me happy or fit into my established goals, then it wasn't worth it. The result is  I'm able to turn jealousy into a positive emotion. 

"I don't want whatever I want. Nobody does. Not really. What kind of fun would it be if I just got everything I ever wanted just like that, and it didn't mean anything? What then?” Neil GaimanCoraline

When a Sophisticate is jealous the question she asks is:

  1. Do I want it? What do I REALLY want?
  2. Is what I'm jealous of worth pursuing to obtain?
  3. Is what I'm jealous of in alignment with my goals?
  4. Am I  grateful for what I have?
  5. If I receive it will I happy? (See Question 1)

According to an article in Psychology Today, envy is a reaction to lacking something whereas jealousy is a reaction to the threat of losing something (usually someone). 

A Sophisticate was designed by God with all the gifts and talents she needs to obtain what she wants. According to the definition in Psychology Today, if she feels as if she is lacking something she works hard to grow to be a better person. She makes a plan and takes action in the form of classes. Envy is an indication that something lacking and provides a Sophisticate with motivation  obtain it because of her natural power. 

When it comes to jealousy, a Sophisticate can't lose something or someone she didn't have to being with and the feeling of fear of losing someone is an indication that is the wrong person. Nothing to prove to anyone that you belong together, no fear in losing someone who is right for you, only trust. There is no "trying" in love there only just love.

My definition of jealousy and envy are: Jealousy - A  desire for something a Sophisticate doesn't have Envy  - When desire meets doubt. A negative feeling that turns into resentment

For me, the reaction of jealousy is the best sign of of what a Sophisticate desires or wants the most.  When it turns to envy it becomes doubt. A Sophisticate is naturally confident and doesn't doubt. She prevents that feeling of insecurity to avoid wrath (A Sophisticate is Wrath) or revenge, that she will end up regretting. 

Anyone can be jealous because it is human nature to want what you can't have but a Sophisticate avoids envy and turns jealousy into a practical evaluation of what she truly wants.  


“As soon as you stop wanting something, you get it.” Andy Warhol

In the end, a Sophisticate is envy because she knows her potential to be a great person. A Sophisticate is jealous because it brings to her attention her wants and inner desires. In the end, there is no competition because a Sophisticate always knows and is confident that she can have what she may be lacking or wants. ;D